Hire me, goddammit.

I sent Gawker excerpts from Jenny 8 Lee’s new book because I had a review copy from work. I then had a brief email exchange with the book editor there and today she published the excerpts that I had sent, complete with the charming yet inane tags that I had given them. Food porn! I said it was food porn and then she used it!

Here’s my dream: Gawker book editor and I exchange a series of erudite emails establishing my quick wit and abundance of snark. In these emails, I mention that I am moving to New York in April. Gawker mentions they have a free associate editor position. Based on the strength of my carefully crafted emails, I start writing for them, perhaps covering race? I have no idea. Whatever. I want to be a part of their world.

Maybe my next step is to make up lit journals and write some clips and slap together a fake portfolio. Shouldn’t I try to live the dream? I’m not sure what the dream is.

On an unrelated note, I wish I used a zipline as my main form of transportation. Even though I am terrified of heights and the idea of my whizzing through the air clutching onto a small piece of metal, a zipline as transport seems to be the funniest/best way to go about matters. I would wear a helmet. It would rule.

Things change.

So.

I got a job about a week ago. I am now an employee of a progressive left news aggregator and online site that raises questions about social injustice and progressive politics and whatever. I don’t know. I talked to Scott about it and we decided that I was the most likely person to get the job because I am the least political person either one of us knows. And so it goes. But now I am gainfully employed, so the blog empire that I had envisioned starting may be put on hold. I will take my knowledge of online advertising and blogs and networking and PHP and what have you and apply it to this thing. Then I will make millions. Millions.

new year

well.

i am really bad at this. i should just do this from work, as it will be much more full of vitriol and all that shit. when i’m home i’m relaxed. i’m watching wife swap. i’m drinking tea, and not that angry. well, i’m always a little angry, but you know. not in a dehibilitating fashion.

oh this old thing

hi.

well.
it’s been a while again. god i suck. how am i ever going to dominate the internet if i don’t update this thing?

anyway. let me provide a bulleted list of what’s been going on in my life. i LOVE lists.

1. i got a haircut. it is short, choppy and i look like a power lesbian. scale of 1-10 it is like a 6.

2. SONIA WILL BE HERE AT THE END OF THE MONTH. THIS FILLS ME WITH GLEE. WE ARE GOING TO BIG SUR AND WE ARE GOIGN TO CAMP AND DRINK AND PLAY CELEBRITY!
3. the chornicle slowly wears away at my soul. with each passing day my youth dies a little more.
4. um! the bay bridge will be closed on our way back into the city. as i know jack shit about how to get anywhere, i am hoping that we will be able to make it home without probs as we will be cranky, stinky and wanting to die.
5. i love jeopardy.
6. this list is really not an update on my life but apparently mental diarrhea.